Body and Spirit

Recently I picked up a book that I had read through with my pastors back in Knoxville called "Sacred Rhythms." While I had read most of the book, there was a couple of sections that I just skimmed through to keep up with the group, and now I wish I hadn't.

The chapters I just read were concerning the theology of the body and the art of self-examination. While I thought I had a pretty good grasp of both concepts, it seems that God had a lot to say to me concerning both of these matters.

Concerning the Body: The belief of total separation of physical health from spiritual health is a trap we can easily fall into. One usually affects the other in a significant way. My physical health affects my spiritual, and my spiritual hinders my desire and motivation for physical health. The cycle continues.

It is also no secret that I am not a huge fan of the DNA that I've been given. Between my brother and other people often making fun of my red hair or my nearly translucent skin, along with other natural/general insecurities, I have not wanted to care for the body that God gave me. As a child or teen I never learned to appreciate the body I have. I never saw the grace that had been given to me or the value that I was bestowed. The focus was always outward, noting that others could tan, that both my siblings were blessed with a kinder metabolism, etc.

God gave me life. He gave my physical form, muscle, color, strength, senses, etc and yet I have not shown Him the gratitude that He is due. Furthermore, I have neglected to appreciate creation in a way that only my physical body can! The taste of water, the feeling of grass, and the brushing of the wind are all examples of things God granted as experiences for us that I often take for granted.

A few months ago I had a friend who ran into my house and excitedly shared her joy in the fact that it was down-pouring rain outside. She insisted that I come stand in the rain with her and dance in it. Moved by her passion I emptied my pockets of anything that might be damaged and ran outside. Even though there were others watching, we didn't care about whether we looked like fools or not. God had given us a gift and we weren't going to miss out!

The Art of Self-Examination: Recognizing that body and Spirit are connected is the first step, but then being aware of the health of both is a wholly different issue. having aware requires focus and time. Neither of which I really like to give when I'm tired. I'm always tired.

Being exhausted often feels like the number one requirement/qualification of my job (residential leadership) and when it comes down to it, the thing I need most I want to do least. This weekend, however, God drew me into a place where meditation was possible (and necessary) and helped me to begin examining my heart and my mind. I doubt I'll ever be a master of self-examination because of the level of discipline and honest it takes, but I'm getting there!

The honesty part is probably the hardest for me. I don't like to see the good in me. Why? No frapping clue. There are some aspects of the bad I don't like to be honest about either.

So here is a confession. This weekend I've experienced a lot of jealous/envy. Jealous of how others look, how fit they are, how tall they are, the relationships they have with our students, etc. I often have to be the "bad guy" at work and I rarely get the benefits that I used to as Mentor rather than as an Assistant House Director. I have been jealous of my staff and even felt a measure of bitterness in hearing their complaints as I take the junk and they get the love, support, and appreciation that often seems lacking in my own life. That's not fair to them though. In the midst of my examination, God drew my attention to this reality and revealed to me how it has been affecting the way I think, feel, and behave.

I love people. A lot. I give all that I can and often that gets overlooked. I find myself torn between trying to live without any need for appreciation and the hard truth that I do, in fact, NEED appreciation. We all do.

All that to say, if I had not taken the time to examine my heart and see where I was at, I couldn't ever address it. I couldn't begin the steps I needed to healing this part of my life and I couldn't ask for help. I couldn't express my need to those who needed to know/wanted to know. In turn my spiritual, mental, and emotional state would continue to degrade and, as a result, so would my physical state. I would not have the energy to try or the ability to focus. Etc.

Give and Take: Having addressed both of these issues, my goal now is to integrate this knowledge into my daily living. I am seeking to take better care of my body and my spirit by bringing both physical and spiritual discipline higher up on my list of priorities. I can't help others if I'm not also seeking to help myself.

I always tell my students "Give more than you take, but never give in order that you can take." The reality is that I have to take to be able to give. I have to take care of myself to give care to others. My ratio of loving others will always be higher than for myself but I still need to care for myself. In the midst of that I never want to become entitled and think that I have earned/deserve love and care just because I give both. I don't love others to make them love me. I love and let love. I have students that I care for who couldn't care less about me, but that shouldn't hinder me from caring about who they are or for their well being, only what I invest and how much I invest in the relationship.

Lastly, giving care often helps us to give care to ourselves. I have often found that in helping another resolve an issue in their life was exactly what God wanted me to do in order to resolve an issue in my own. God reveals a lot to us through the lives of others. So just as we must take care, we absolutely must give care as well.

Can you imagine what life would be like if the entire world lived out this concept?

Grace and Peace,
Stephen 

Freedom and Stability: Worship in a World of Chaos

The world is ever shifting and changing. Life proves to be consistently unstable and often unpredictable. Faith and worship are the anchors that hold us steady as the hurricanes rage against the battered ships of our souls. But just how stable are our anchors and supports? Can the pillars of our faith hold when our world starts to shake? Does our worship of God strengthen those pillars, or does it hollow the infrastructure?

I have been in search of the answer to this question over the course of the last couple years, and while I have not come to an ending conclusion, I do believe that I have made a great deal of discoveries over the past year and would like to share some of those thoughts here and now.

I grew up in the contemporary/Charismatic tradition. I am intimately familiar with "modern" worship services. In my home church, I found music pleasing to listen to, exciting, moving, and LOUD! I loved it all, and I loved how God worked in me through those experiences. I am highly sympathetic to those who choose to worship in these "concert-like" settings and to the styles thereof, but I think that there is an aspect of worship and the Christian life that one is robbed of when they only worships in this form. I am also, however, ashamed of the shallowness of much worship and overly emotional actions of many. Unfortunately, the foci of many within the worships services that I've attended all over the U.S. were erratic and often self-serving as people were more concerned with their "experiences" rather than about God and His truth. I am one of those many people who cared to much about experiencing something and about whether or not I ended up on my knees crying than about adoring God and speaking (or singing) words of truth, honor, and faith.

Again, I do not think charismatic worship is wrong, just incomplete. I was greatly shaped and challenged through charismatic worship as a teenager and I know that God used all of it to make me a better person and to pull me closer to Him. Yet, there was something missing in the midst of it all; I would not grow in Christ as much as I am able to if God had left me there and not begun working on my heart this area of my faith. I believe that worship is less shaped by who we are, and rather that it shapes us. There are those two-faced people who live completely different outside of Church than they would act within, and it is sad that people can live out their lives with a disassociated faith, but I would venture to say that they are still affected by their form of worship.

First, what is worship? thefreedictionary.com gave the following definitions:


wor·ship n.
1.
     a. The reverent love and devotion accorded a deity, an idol, or a sacred object.
     b. The ceremonies, prayers, or other religious forms by which this love is expressed.
2. Ardent devotion; adoration.
3. often Worship Chiefly British Used as a form of address for magistrates, mayors, and certain other dignitaries:
v. wor·shiped or wor·shipped, wor·ship·ing or wor·ship·ping, wor·ships
v.tr.
1. To honor and love as a deity.
2. To regard with ardent or adoring esteem or devotion. See Synonyms at revere1.
v.intr.
1. To participate in religious rites of worship.
2. To perform an act of worship.

Humans have questioned worship and what is the most "true" form of worship. I once was one of those who argued that true worship involved lots of passion and "freedom" to do what you wanted; that loud, emotional services were what God was most please by. I condemned liturgical worship for being "dry, artificial, and unpleasing to God." I was among those who thought of non-Charismatic worshipers as prideful, starchy Christians who were too arrogant for their own good. I mean how dare they tell us that our form of worship is wrong when it is so obvious that is the ONLY right way to worship! Besides, all those ritualistic words and phrases make "them Catholics" no better than pagans and witches right?!

Wrong.

Liturgical worship is authentic, God-pleasing, beautiful, and freeing. I have heard many critique liturgy and say "I couldn't go to that kind of church cause I have to have my freedom to worship God" without even having the understanding of the depths of worshiping liturgically. There is freedom and life in structured worship that can't be found in some of the more "low-church" settings! Liturgical worship disciples and teaches the doctrines of the church with greater depth and complexity than most of the non-liturgical worship we see throughout the Church today (most of which is actually quite shallow). I have felt the presence of God during a Latin mass just as much as I have in buck-wild Pentecostal Church.

I recently was reading a book in which one of the main characters was being tortured by an evil king who had her beaten with iron rod that had been heated within a furnace. In the book she faces all sort of torments and mental stress, but through the whole thing she focused on rites and rituals. The rituals allowed her to maintain her sanity and to keep from letting her willpower fail. The stability and consistency of liturgical/ritualistic worship helps bring stability to the unstable world we live in. It is an anchor to reality. It is also the way the early church worshiped! As well as the Israelites of the old testament. The book of Psalms contains this form or worship as well.

Both liturgical and non-liturgical worship have important elements to them that benefit the life of the believer. While it isn't about us, I believe God designed that worship be beneficial to the worshiper. There are times where we should worship with all our emotions and lay on our faces with tears pouring from our eyes and loose our grip on our self control so as to, in a way, expose ourselves before God and make ourselves emotionally vulnerable to Him. We should also, however, worship in rich, symbolic rituals of the ancient faith for is strengthens us and disciples us. Worship with  your intellect. Worship in unity with the Church all over the world. Worship in "spirit and in truth". I personally practice both forms continuously throughout the week.

Lastly, stop making it about you! Worship is about God and not about you. It's not about what you want or how you want to worship. Be grateful that you have liberty and that God is not overly strict on the way the Church is to worship, but do not think that it is your right to worship as you deem most right. It is your privilege. Whether you ever cried or not, whether you ever were made aware of the presence of the Holy One or not, you are to worship. Don't condemn others for worshiping in a way that is different than yours and think it as being less pleasing than yours. The fact of the matter is, they very well maybe worshiping far more authentically and God-pleasing than you are.

By Spirit or By Flesh

 The other day I was drinking coffee with my best friend at our favorite local coffee shop. I was reading Paul's letter to the Philippians while he was studying the biblical text (whether in Hebrew or Greek, I remember not). Now, I had read this letter many times of the course of my life, as have most people who were raised in a "Christian" home (I do not put the word "Christian" in quotations to say that may family does not meet that criteria. I do so to ease my conviction of misusing a noun as an adjective). As I was reading, however, I found myself struck by one of the passages and began meditating on Paul's words. Here are the verse that the Holy Spirit struck my heart with.

^{Philippians 1:12} I want you to know, brothers,^[e] that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, ¹³ so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard^[f] and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ. ¹⁴ And most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word^[g] without fear.

¹⁵  Some indeed preach Christ from envy and rivalry, but others from good will. ¹⁶ The latter do it out of love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel. ¹⁷ The former proclaim Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely but thinking to afflict me in my imprisonment. ¹⁸ What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed, and in that I rejoice.

Astounding! A lot of times in the church we find ourselves arguing and debating over frivolous things, such as sprinkling vs. fully emerging baptisms, KJV vs. modern translations, cultural equivalency vs. ignoring culture, etc. etc. etc. As for me, I often find myself being overly critical of actions being taken within the Church. "Is that biblical?", "Are your intentions pure?", "Is this being led by a manipulator?", "What are the consequences of what you just said in your sermon?" These are all good questions in and of themselves, but my heart is rarely in the right place, and I ultimately miss the most important questions of all..."Is God being glorified in the lives of men?" and "Is it advancing the Kingdom?" These two question are far more important than anything else.

When I read these words of Paul, I suddenly had recollections of a man in a small town just an hour North of my city. I had been driving through and had stopped at the local grocery store for a drink and was headed on my way. As I was leaving the building I noticed him standing on the far side of the parking lot with a book in his hand and he was yelling out into the parking lot. He had no one in particular that he was speaking too directly, and the book in his hand was obviously a Bible. He yelled out one of the most passionate "hell-fire and brimstone sermons" that I have heard to date and he would not stop. My initial attitude toward him was not one of awe, compassion, or respect. In fact I found myself rather angry at him for his choice of methods for preaching the gospel. In my mind it was a misrepresentation of Christ, even though nothing he said was actually false, but it weighed more on the element of fear and emotion to entice people to seek a "fire-escape" Savior. It was not a sermon preached with love and compassion...but with a fierce anger.


God, however, stepped in and has offered me a firm, yet gentle, rebuke through the writing of one of His greatest servants. Paul's words rang in my mind over and over like the sound of church bells echoing through a city. Paul makes it clear that he doesn't care whether they are preaching in love or with selfishness, as long as Christ is being proclaimed to the lost! Ultimately, we know that those who preached out of selfishness will have to answer for their actions, but what matters above all else is that Christ is glorified among the the sinners of the World!

So how many other people have I looked upon with pride and arrogance because they did not have the complexity of doctrine and training that I've had? How many times have I grieved the Holy Spirit because of my foolishness, instead of looking at my fellow believers with love and compassion? I have not changed in my disapproval of that man choice of methodology, but instead I take heart and am now praising God that he is being used to spread the Gospel regardless of how he is doing it. As long as the truth being taught, and the Gospel not perverted, then what wrong method is there?