My parents SUCKED at self-care, so naturally I wasn't going to learn it from them. My pastors growing up had no concept of it, Hollywood distorts it more than the news distort racial discrimination (Too soon?), and the first time I ever really heard any teaching on it (let alone actually seeing it done) was in college.
Working at a job that demands the majority of your week, and the nearly all of your sanity, I have had to do some learning in the area of slef-care. After 6 months of this, however, I am still learning how to do it right!
Here is what I've learned so far:
1) You are the ONLY one responsible for insuring your own health. You can ask for help and recieve aid, but ultimately it comes down to you. If youur job is preventing that, tell them. They can't help you unless you make it known. They won't help? Look for a new job. Environment affecting your ability to do this? Change it. You will not get the care you need unless you take the intitive to get it.
2) Search out what helps you. Humanity is diverse and so is self-care. We each have our own goals, desires, triggers, energy-providers, etc and therefore we each have different needs for health and well-being. There are some basics that help everyone like getting involved in a physical activity, eating healthy, and getting sleep, but the details of each of those is where we begin to express our indiviualty.
Furthermore, our personailties and temperments have a major say in how we send our time and what activities give us energy. For example, I need quiet time and relaxation. i need calm people and deeper, more intimate conversation from people I love and trust. A dear friend of mine often turns to dancing, talking to randomm strangers, and general goofiness his means of unwinding and re-energizing.
Neither are wrong. Just different.
3) Set proper boundaries. This is something I really frappin' suck at!!! Saying no to people that I know will not provide me the enrionment i need for self-care, spending too much of my off time with my kids, doing hospital and airport runs on my off time, etc. These are ways that I fail to set boundaries for myself and thus set myself up for exhaustion and a rough week. Boundaries are an important part of life and society. Without them we run the risk of being used, manipulated, and having the life sucked right out of us (speakign form experience!). While establishing boundaries isn't an easy task, it is definitely one fo the most important ones.
So there are some of my thoughts on the ambigious, challenging, and esstial topic of self-care!
Grace and Peace,
Stephen
