I did it! I made it a full year as Direct Care Staff, and I even signed on for another year!
I was recently conversing with one of the new interns, just joking around and having casual conversation. Suddenly, she looked at me and asked the question that all interns ask at one point or another: "How did you survive your year?"
There were several times where I didn't think I was going to. At month 4 I had my first "I wanna quit" moment. At 6 months I had hit "The Wall" and I wasn't sure that I was being useful or that I had any benefit to the kids that I had come to know and love. At month 9 I grew worried about getting through the summer, and I was certain that I wasn't able to make it another year.
At month 10 I was instilled with supernatural strength and destroyed the arch-demon Melphesto and...oh wait....sorry that was a video game...
At month 10 God helped me push through and gave me my second wind. At that point I knew (but didn't want to admit) that I was staying for a 2nd year and that I had found my niche.
I had my struggles throughout the year, but something I realized was that IT WASN'T IMPOSSIBLE! And that it wasn't necessarily harder than what I had been going through before coming here. It was jut different. I had to learn a lot and I had to do it while tired.
Every difficulty feels harder when it's in the moment. We can say a dozen times "this is the hardest thing I've ever been through" when the reality is that it's simply the most present difficulty and therefore feels like the most difficult.
In light of the question that was asked, I decided to share the top 3 things that helped me and that, I believe, are essentials for surviving...residential care? Ministry? Voluntary Parenthood? Whatever you wanna call it. These apply to a lot more than my job.
So let's get started!
1) I never would have made it if I had not learned proper Spiritual Self-Care. There were seasons where I pulled away from people and I spent time doing things I enjoyed, but that wasn't always enough. I needed to center myself in Christ.
The best and most effective season of my year were when I took the time to not only pull away but to be intentional about meditating and praying. Reflecting on who I was and what I was going through and handing them over to God to be dealt with in unison with Him.
This will probably look different for other people. Some need to dance and scream and blast praise music, while others need complete silence, and others still need to go for a run while they pray.
2) Mentorship. Being intentional about finding and engaging mentorship is huge! Having a wiser and more experienced individual to pour into your life and listen to your struggles with genuine love is essential.
Our growth and maturity is limited without the guidance and love of a mentor who can be honest, stern, and supportive. While we do have the Spirit to mentor and comfort, God did not intend for us to go through life without human mentors as well. That's why Christ set up the church as a model of how to mentor!
3) Coffee. Just kidding! Brotherhood was huge part of making it through the year. If it weren't for my fellow Bigs standing with me and giving me love and support I would not have grown or succeeded as I did.
I needed them and they needed me. We all tried to it alone for the longest time, but month 6 came around and the reality hit us all....we couldn't do it without community; without brotherhood. When we unified and worked together, then we had strength we never expected and we took our house out of a very rough spot and into a stability that no one thought possible.
There are other things that helped me get through my year, but these are the top 3 that I believe made my year a success. Maybe you will find these to be the same for you as well.
Grace and Peace,
Stephen
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