The other day I was sitting in Starbucks trying to relax from a long week and browsing the internet when I got a strange, sudden urge to look something up. I had heard a hundred times that there are scholarships out there for simply being a redhead! Well, in light of my contemplating a return to school to pursue a Master's I decided to go ahead and look it up. That's when I found Redheads Anonymous.
I got a good laugh out of the site, but as I was there I noticed a link to a survey where one could answer questions about being a ginger. Naturally I clicked the link to see what kind of questions I was going to be asked, and I found myself surprised by the questions.
The questions asked about bullying, my feelings towards being redhead, my "relationship" with my hair, etc. They asked about my identity and how being a redhead affected my identity.
Anyone who knew me as a teen knows that I have long wrestled with questions of identity, but rarely gotten anywhere with my questioning. I often found myself going round in circles, bound by the strongholds (see future blog post!) that held me down and kept me enslaved.
My teens that I work with struggle with this as well.
They say teens are supposed to wrestle with identity and start asking those questions as they begin to think more abstractly, but none of my psych books suggest an end date. Worse yet, they offer very little advice in helping to foster these questions other than "encouraging" them to happen.
Here are a few of the identity markers that I've come to realize are important in teens (and adults).
I got a good laugh out of the site, but as I was there I noticed a link to a survey where one could answer questions about being a ginger. Naturally I clicked the link to see what kind of questions I was going to be asked, and I found myself surprised by the questions.
The questions asked about bullying, my feelings towards being redhead, my "relationship" with my hair, etc. They asked about my identity and how being a redhead affected my identity.
Anyone who knew me as a teen knows that I have long wrestled with questions of identity, but rarely gotten anywhere with my questioning. I often found myself going round in circles, bound by the strongholds (see future blog post!) that held me down and kept me enslaved.
My teens that I work with struggle with this as well.
They say teens are supposed to wrestle with identity and start asking those questions as they begin to think more abstractly, but none of my psych books suggest an end date. Worse yet, they offer very little advice in helping to foster these questions other than "encouraging" them to happen.
Here are a few of the identity markers that I've come to realize are important in teens (and adults).
- Race-in a world infected with racism, I often want to avoid this one. The truth is, however, that one's identity is affected by the origins and skin color. We identify with those that are similar to us and build our relationships and culture that way. There is revolution to fight against this because of the racism that often grows out that, but the fact is that it is there.
- Race 2.0-for me, race affects me differently. Being a ginger I am a subcategory of the White people and, in many cases, the "reject" of the white race or the "special" of the Whites...kinda depends on who you're talking to haha! My identity has genuinely affected by my hair color, but more so as a child than as an adult, but the affects it had in my early years grew into adulthood.
- Age/youthfulness-we find a lot of our identity in our age and, by default, our peers of the same age.
- Citizenship/Country of Birth- you are fooling yourself if you think that your country of birth doesn't have an affect on you. the culture you were raised in has the first and foremost affect, but I don't know a single person who hasn't thought upon the country of their birth found a measure of their identity in that. I know several teens that have been adopted from another country, and even though they grew up here in the states, they have made a connection back to their roots in Haiti, Jamaica, etc.
- Religion-your faith is a huge identity shaper! Unlike race, it is not a physical issue, but a metaphysical issue. It is not something treated the same way and more wholly affects your lifestyle and choices than that of the skin and facial feature. It is the greatest identity changer of them all!
These are all things that I've had to face a teen and as a young adult. As a teen, however, I was not able to bridge the gap from questioning to answering. Even in college I struggled to come to real, solid conclusions about who I was as a person. I had to do a lot of growing, developing, and healing before I was able to accomplish this.
Now I sit here, an adult, asking new questions of identity. Who do I want to be? What do I want to do? What is my "thing"? What do I have to offer my community? What are my priorities in life?
Here is a glimpse of me:
I, Stephen Dewane Green II, am a single redheaded Christian from Tennessee with a B.A. in Christian Ministry and I currently work as a Direct Care Staff at Shelterwood Academy. I am in Christ. I am human. I am healing. I am searching. I am loved. I like art. I love people. I am someone's middle child and someone else's oldest child. I am angry. I am hurt. I am forgiving. I am sensitive. I am compassionate. I am giving. I am thoughtful. I am a hard worker. I am undisciplined. I am trying my best to not compare myself to others. I am going to change the world.
Grace and Peace,
Stephen
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